It all begins when the whole saying "BLOOD IS THICKER THAN THE WATER"comes into play.I just hate the feeling that someone is going to get hurt in the end,whether it's me sacrificing my happiness to make my parents happy or making my parents upset or breaking someone's heart.
I'd like to believe that a happy ending is possible. Am I being naive romantic in choosing love and someone that makes me happy? Or should I self-sacrifice to appease my family?
While seeing the life,we are living in and with the people around i had come to something...which i wanna share....
A suitable match made by parents is likely to be more deliberate; one that time has proved appropriate, and one dictated entirely by their experience an insight their children do not yet possess. Having lived most of their life and learnt the usefulness of certain attributes, mothers and fathers are likely to see qualities such as security, commitment, a good education and great financial and career prospects as paramount in selecting a spouse for their offspring
In short, the parents' choice of partners for their children is usually based on intellectual and material needs while the youngsters themselves seek partners to satisfy physical, emotional ones.The final element young people seek is excitement. And they get that in abundance in the early days of feeling in love' and besotted. In the absence of experience and knowledge, young adults have to rely upon their own instincts, physical demands and individual sensitivity to decide on a mate.
Attraction for most in-love couples at the youthful stage is thus spontaneous and more physical, giving maximum excitement almost reckless, in fact. Ruled totally by emotion and physical needs, it has little time for studied, parental logic, especially if this choice is in opposition to their own!
Wednesday, May 26, 2010
Thursday, May 20, 2010
TOXIC Relationship
Walking away is not easy. Staying away is even harder.It is a day to day battle that allows true strength to emerge.
We will constantly say that the “fight” is silly.The question iz Has the toxic person really changed? Did the events that have recently unfolded been the catalyst to promoting change in that person? Have they shown proof of the change? Do not think that a simple apology or even everyone expecting that things should just go back to normal is evidence of true change. True change takes time. If it happens immediately, which I tend to doubt being true, deep changes, then time should still be taken to ensure that the change will last.Common sense says that if they have changed, then they should understand the need of caution and the importance of seeing long term proof of the change before any sort of commitment can be made to a future with them.
What will happen if they are forgiven and life gets back to normal and the toxic person has not changed?
someone with a history
of or suspicion of possible violence, then more care must be taken in considering whether to believe in the miracle of instant change.
Walking away or ending a relationship is not easy. Some people may make it look easy. When there is a history with the person,it becomes a life or death issue.
It took strength to walk away. It will take even more strength to stay away. With time, the strength required will appear to lessen.
We will constantly say that the “fight” is silly.The question iz Has the toxic person really changed? Did the events that have recently unfolded been the catalyst to promoting change in that person? Have they shown proof of the change? Do not think that a simple apology or even everyone expecting that things should just go back to normal is evidence of true change. True change takes time. If it happens immediately, which I tend to doubt being true, deep changes, then time should still be taken to ensure that the change will last.Common sense says that if they have changed, then they should understand the need of caution and the importance of seeing long term proof of the change before any sort of commitment can be made to a future with them.
What will happen if they are forgiven and life gets back to normal and the toxic person has not changed?
someone with a history
of or suspicion of possible violence, then more care must be taken in considering whether to believe in the miracle of instant change.
Walking away or ending a relationship is not easy. Some people may make it look easy. When there is a history with the person,it becomes a life or death issue.
It took strength to walk away. It will take even more strength to stay away. With time, the strength required will appear to lessen.
Sunday, May 2, 2010
Sister,I LOVE YOU
Diii you were the strongest girl of our home...you did the hard chores,you helped mother at work.You were so simple but alwayz received the blame.You always yearned for love and name but life can be so cruel neva thought.Thanxs for all the times you helped me to face the hardships.When the love and evrything was fading from our family you were the one who took the courage to help us recover back.You looked after me and kept me safe.I miss those fights...i miss those laughs.....You were a piece of heart which no one can take apart because you mean so so much to me.
u use to hold me tight,u use to kiss me goodnight,u use to know when im mad,u use to know when im sad
I have trouble bringing up vivid memories of u. It's not that they don't exist, it's that they stay below the surface most of the time It is a sight I will never forget and it haunted me for many months afterwards. It was if my heart had been ripped out of me for I had lost my very best friend and one of the people I admired most in the world.Many people don’t get that chance and lament about having just a little more time to tell someone how much they were loved. My sister had no doubt of how much I loved her. Yes, we had arguments, but never stayed angry with each other long, and usually ended up laughing and joking about our silly argument. NOTHING is more important than love and family, and my beloved sister, dii taught that to me more than anyone else. Her death is the hardest thing I ever faced in my life. Grief is such a painful experience and, unfortunately, the pain is there for a long time. When I could not sleep,write my thoughts down or just talk out loud to myself when no one else was available to listen.
I still miss her and sometimes cry, and I believe the pain of her loss will ALWAYS be there.I call your name and u dnt answer back,and i look for you in every familiar place
CAN I GET U BACK.........
u use to hold me tight,u use to kiss me goodnight,u use to know when im mad,u use to know when im sad
I have trouble bringing up vivid memories of u. It's not that they don't exist, it's that they stay below the surface most of the time It is a sight I will never forget and it haunted me for many months afterwards. It was if my heart had been ripped out of me for I had lost my very best friend and one of the people I admired most in the world.Many people don’t get that chance and lament about having just a little more time to tell someone how much they were loved. My sister had no doubt of how much I loved her. Yes, we had arguments, but never stayed angry with each other long, and usually ended up laughing and joking about our silly argument. NOTHING is more important than love and family, and my beloved sister, dii taught that to me more than anyone else. Her death is the hardest thing I ever faced in my life. Grief is such a painful experience and, unfortunately, the pain is there for a long time. When I could not sleep,write my thoughts down or just talk out loud to myself when no one else was available to listen.
I still miss her and sometimes cry, and I believe the pain of her loss will ALWAYS be there.I call your name and u dnt answer back,and i look for you in every familiar place
CAN I GET U BACK.........
Monday, April 26, 2010
Relationship Compatibility
Many people erroneously believe that "opposites attract", and seek a partner with interests opposite to their own under the illusion that this is a good way to form an enduring bond.While it is true that opposites do attract sometimes, this attraction usually doesn't hold up to the reality of everyday life and commitment.
Compatibility has a lot to do with the satisfaction and happiness you feel in your romantic relationships. When two people are compatible, they enjoy each other's company and find it easy to talk to one another. This is because their similarities are so great that they become excited that someone else in the world shares the same likes and dislikes. However, some couples do not find excitement in similarities, which is when opposites attract. Sometimes when two people date and have different tastes, styles and thoughts about life, they get along and are compatible. The reason for this is that these types of couples find differences intriguing and they appreciate each other for them. Respect for each other's views and opinions are important in this type of relationship.
Compatibility has a lot to do with the satisfaction and happiness you feel in your romantic relationships. When two people are compatible, they enjoy each other's company and find it easy to talk to one another. This is because their similarities are so great that they become excited that someone else in the world shares the same likes and dislikes. However, some couples do not find excitement in similarities, which is when opposites attract. Sometimes when two people date and have different tastes, styles and thoughts about life, they get along and are compatible. The reason for this is that these types of couples find differences intriguing and they appreciate each other for them. Respect for each other's views and opinions are important in this type of relationship.
Saturday, April 10, 2010
How 2 Manage ur ANGER...?
Im nt writin ds 4 maself bt 4sum 1..who needs 2knw...
Someone said: “For every minute you are angry, you lose sixty seconds of happiness”.Once Prophet Muhammad said "The strong is not the one who overcomes the people by his strength, but the strong is the one who controls himself while in anger."
Anger is a natural sentimental condition which you shouldn’t be ashamed of. Anger symptoms are: frustration feelings, tendency to use ridicule, muscles
and nerves tension.
Ave read sumwhr...the ways 2 control your ANGER:
1- Have sense of humor. Don’t be angry of trivial matters or problems which can’t be solved easily or momentarily and try to find a way out. Also, deal with your problem as a funny thing and always simplify it. Whether you pout or not, whether you frown or not, the problem has already occurred and your emotions will not solve it so you use your common sense to deal with it.
2- Exercising is one of the efficient ways to control your anger like swimming, jogging or walking. That’s why sports people don’t get angry easily.
3- Relaxation. Try to have enough sleep because people who don’t sleep enough tend to be groggy and a trouble mongers. Also, try to meditate and have a brisk walk once in a while with maintaining deep breath exercise.
4- There are other means to control you anger like adopting a hobby (if you don’t have one). Read a lot; take care of your garden or lawn. Discuss your anger with the person who triggered it or consult a friend.
After all, anger is just a state of mind where the angry person tends to see things blurry which hinders him/ her to observe the logicality of the whole issue. Sometimes, the problem is very easy, but when we amplify it, it gets bigger and tougher to solve.
Someone said: “For every minute you are angry, you lose sixty seconds of happiness”.Once Prophet Muhammad said "The strong is not the one who overcomes the people by his strength, but the strong is the one who controls himself while in anger."
Anger is a natural sentimental condition which you shouldn’t be ashamed of. Anger symptoms are: frustration feelings, tendency to use ridicule, muscles
and nerves tension.
Ave read sumwhr...the ways 2 control your ANGER:
1- Have sense of humor. Don’t be angry of trivial matters or problems which can’t be solved easily or momentarily and try to find a way out. Also, deal with your problem as a funny thing and always simplify it. Whether you pout or not, whether you frown or not, the problem has already occurred and your emotions will not solve it so you use your common sense to deal with it.
2- Exercising is one of the efficient ways to control your anger like swimming, jogging or walking. That’s why sports people don’t get angry easily.
3- Relaxation. Try to have enough sleep because people who don’t sleep enough tend to be groggy and a trouble mongers. Also, try to meditate and have a brisk walk once in a while with maintaining deep breath exercise.
4- There are other means to control you anger like adopting a hobby (if you don’t have one). Read a lot; take care of your garden or lawn. Discuss your anger with the person who triggered it or consult a friend.
After all, anger is just a state of mind where the angry person tends to see things blurry which hinders him/ her to observe the logicality of the whole issue. Sometimes, the problem is very easy, but when we amplify it, it gets bigger and tougher to solve.
Monday, March 29, 2010
Dii.........I LOVE YOU
People say that time helps, but it doesn't really.I still miss her just as much now, as I did then. I still remember the day clearly.
I hate how people tell you that they know how you feel.They don't know how you feel. They might have an idea about how you might feel, but they're not you, they have no idea what's running through your head.
If tears could build a stairway and thoughts a memory lane..I'd walk right up to heaven
and bring you home again.My heart still active in sadness And secret tears still flow
But now I know you want us to be strong enough like you use to be..and want us to remember all the happy times.
God knows why with that chilling touch gathers those we love so much..
Few lines 4u dii...
I wanna touch your hand,
I wanna see your eyes,
I wanna be your friend,
I wanna share my lies,
I wanna show you my life,
I wanna show you my love,
I wanna show you how I cry,
But your so high above,
How is god treating you,
I hope he understands,
That when I get up there,
He will let us hold our hands,
I hate how people tell you that they know how you feel.They don't know how you feel. They might have an idea about how you might feel, but they're not you, they have no idea what's running through your head.
If tears could build a stairway and thoughts a memory lane..I'd walk right up to heaven
and bring you home again.My heart still active in sadness And secret tears still flow
But now I know you want us to be strong enough like you use to be..and want us to remember all the happy times.
God knows why with that chilling touch gathers those we love so much..
Few lines 4u dii...
I wanna touch your hand,
I wanna see your eyes,
I wanna be your friend,
I wanna share my lies,
I wanna show you my life,
I wanna show you my love,
I wanna show you how I cry,
But your so high above,
How is god treating you,
I hope he understands,
That when I get up there,
He will let us hold our hands,
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
They gave me LIFE...but it's my LIFE
Life and Marriage are similar in many ways.Firstly,there are no guarantees in either.Secondly, there are no fixed rules for living a good life or ‘making’ a good marriage that applies to all people.And both LIFE AND MARRIAGE throws up surprises.
When our opinions differ to our parent's they usually tell us that "we will alway's be your parents and you alway's be a child." However, are parents ALWAYS right? Given that parents too are human beings, is there a chance they too could be wrong or make the wrong decision(s)… Particularly when it comes to choosing a life-mate?
We have been in a nation with a close-knit family structure where parents play a large hand – and till much later in their children’s adult lives – in decision-making. From the subjects children choose in school, to the college they go to, who their friends are, to living arrangements, marriage and even when naming grandchildren, parents are/ have been an integral part of our decisions. Often when children – now adults – take decisions without consulting their parents, it is taken as an ‘insult’ or a sign of disregard.
When parents oppose your choice of spouse, it is never an easy decision; and sometimes it is not possible to keep all parties happy. In such times, it is important to know and answer: Is your decision a sensible one and will you be happy? Often taking a decision based on personal happiness is deemed ‘selfish’, however one needs to remember that till the time you are not happy, you cannot make others happy.
When our opinions differ to our parent's they usually tell us that "we will alway's be your parents and you alway's be a child." However, are parents ALWAYS right? Given that parents too are human beings, is there a chance they too could be wrong or make the wrong decision(s)… Particularly when it comes to choosing a life-mate?
We have been in a nation with a close-knit family structure where parents play a large hand – and till much later in their children’s adult lives – in decision-making. From the subjects children choose in school, to the college they go to, who their friends are, to living arrangements, marriage and even when naming grandchildren, parents are/ have been an integral part of our decisions. Often when children – now adults – take decisions without consulting their parents, it is taken as an ‘insult’ or a sign of disregard.
When parents oppose your choice of spouse, it is never an easy decision; and sometimes it is not possible to keep all parties happy. In such times, it is important to know and answer: Is your decision a sensible one and will you be happy? Often taking a decision based on personal happiness is deemed ‘selfish’, however one needs to remember that till the time you are not happy, you cannot make others happy.
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